A Not So Bitter Look At Love

“Love's a trick, love's a trap
Love's a hot chick with the clap
Love's a hoax, love's a tease
A pinata full of bees
Love's a joke, love's a scam
A Sargent Slaughter body slam
Love's a wound, watch it bleed”

The above words are lyrics from the critically panned musical adaptation of The Wedding Singer. As a single woman well into her twenties on the eve of Valentine’s Day, I should be raising my hands up in the air Judd Nelson style in triumph at the truth found within this particular verse. Despite my love of a good Breakfast Club reenactment, my arms will remain at my side tonight because honestly I don’t believe it. Love is neither a hoax nor a scam.

Don’t get me wrong; I appreciate any song that references 1980’s professional wrestlers but I just can’t get behind the whole ‘love isn’t real’ message behind it. Not so much the message I guess as the attitude that goes with it. Having played the role of the single friend for many years, I understand the urge to be bitter about being on my own especially when everywhere you go there is literally a glossy heart hanging over your head reminding you that a huge percentage of the population has a date tomorrow and you don’t. That part sucks, but that doesn’t it mean that love is a lie or should be looked down upon.

Just because something sucks doesn’t mean that the appropriate response is to throw garbage on it (literally or figuratively). I have witnessed so many people who when not part of a couple choose February 14^th to suddenly get vocal about their disbelief in love. To each their own, I suppose but what does throwing yourself a pity party accomplish? Even though I understand the frustration that comes with being the "single one", I refuse to jump on that bandwagon of negativity. This year I am going to spend this Hallmark holiday thinking about all the other kinds of love I have in my life.

I think that it is easy for us table of one’s to forget that love comes in all different varieties not just romance flavor. Again all those commercials being shoved down our throat this time of year probably don’t help the situation. But it is our responsibility and ours alone to not let the commercialism of this holiday get us down. Honestly, if I feel bad at all about my place in life at the moment that’s on me. I may be paying for my own movie ticket this weekend and I currently have no one to practice my googly eyes on, but that in no way implies that I am missing out on affection.

I am loved everyday by a group of outstanding people who by some twist of fate understand and appreciate me. I am loved in the morning when the coffee pot is set up for me before I’m even awake. I am loved in the afternoon when I receive a text letting me know that a release date has been set for that book I’ve been waiting on. I am loved in the evening when my best friend reminds me that I’m not a horrible person because she was thinking the same terrible thing I was. I may be what those terrible rom-com books refer to as a singleton, but I am far from alone.

So as Valentine’s Day rears it glittery head once again, I will not make raspberry sounds with my mouth as I pass couples holding hands or thrust my thumbs down when a romantic comedy comes on TV. This holiday will be spent thinking of all the incredible loves ones I’ve managed to encounter thus far and I will celebrate them….with a silent toast and a ton of heart shaped chocolate.

If you still feel like your heart could use some warming up before Valentine’s Day gets into full swing, click below for a love that is slightly more positive than the one previously discussed: